By D.Gilpin

(c) DEG 1999

My name is David Moore; I was born and raised in the city. Condos, townhouses, apartments, everybody living right on top of each other. I longed for open spaces, where a man could stand on his front porch and not see another house, or another person. Well finally that day came when I realized my dream. I was forty-four and tired of losing the rat race to the rats. I was looking through a magazine and something caught my eye. The ad read "165 acres unspoiled remote site, in Wyoming, $65,000 owner finance. I called right away and made arrangements to fly out to meet with the man and look at the property.

When I got there, I rented a Jeep and went to the hotel, and called him to let him know I was there. We agreed to meet at one of the only two restaurants in town for lunch, then we would drive out to look at the property. Mr. Kirkness told me he had inherited the property. It was flanked on one side by a wildlife sanctuary and on the other by an Indian reservation. The people of the Indian tribe lived for the most part, on the other side of the reservation, which meant the property was in the middle of about 5000 acres of wilderness. The only way I could get any further out is if I'd bought land on the moon. It was just what I was looking for. We agreed on a payment schedule, went to the lawyer's office and had the papers drawn up, and I headed back east to sell my house and prepare to move to the wilderness.

Back east, I bought an old school bus and converted it into a makeshift motor home. I loaded up all of my belongings and I was off. I didn't even look back. I felt like the pioneers heading west in a wagon train. It was exciting. I drove for four days, and finally got there. In the evening of the fourth day I set up camp and settled in for the night. I built a fire, got out a lounge chair and a cold beer, watched the stars, and listened as the coyotes and crickets sang to me. I couldn't have been happier. The next day I decided I needed some sort of transportation to explore my new world, so I drove the bus into town and purchased an old pickup, a horse trailer, and a horse. I always wanted a horse. She was a pretty buckskin filly, only about five years old but very well behaved. In the days to follow Sally (I named her Sally) and I would explore our new home. About the fifth or sixth day we came upon a long forgotten cabin, on the side near the wildlife sanctuary. It looked structurally sound, but what a mess. I think some animals, maybe some raccoons or squirrels, had been in there. "Well, Sally, if we can get this place cleaned up, I think we have a home."

With Sally's help, I got the cabin livable by the first snow. Winters here in Wyoming can be brutal, and this one broke me in right. Even the animals were having a rough time of it, and I would put food out for them, when I could. During the warmer months, when I was working on the cabin, I took some time to plant a garden, so I had plenty of veggies. Also, I laid in a lot of provisions in case I couldn't get out. Like I said the animals were not fairing too well, food was scarce. So I wasn't too surprised when some of my food stores were taken, and I wouldn't have minded much. The animals had to eat too, but a lot started to disappear. If I was going to last out the winter, I was going to have to put a stop to it. So I put a lock on the shed where I stored the food, but that didn't stop the thefts. I had only one choice left; I was going to have to use the gun. My hope was if I shot over its head maybe that would scare it off. I sat out in the shed nearly all night, and nothing, so I left my gun loaded next to the front door. Several nights went by with out incident, then I heard it, something was in my food shed. I grabbed my gun and walked out on the porch. Then I saw it, it was much bigger then a coon, it startled me. My gun went off. It fell to the ground. I ran over to it to see-- Oh My God! I think I shot somebody! As I approached what I thought to be a human, I noticed it had a tail. Thank God, it's just an animal. Wait a minute, it---it's wearing clothes. What's going on? What have I done!?

I knelt down beside it to see if it was still alive, it was, unconscious but still alive. I carefully rolled it over to see what it was. A girl? In a fur coat? I looked at her face to see.... She had a muzzle? And pointed ears, on top of her head? What is this, a bad joke? I couldn't see much as it was dark, I knew she wouldn't survive out here, and I had to tend to her wounds. I picked her up--she wasn't heavy, must have been half starved--and carried her into the cabin. I made a bed for her near the fireplace to warm her. Then I got my first aid kit. You know, I'll bet she's from the reservation. That's it, she's wearing one of those ceremonial masks. As I knelt beside her, I received the shock of my life. It's not a mask; the muzzle and ears are real. My God, she's--- Equine. Now I'm really cracking up. OK, MAN! Snap out of it! Whatever she is, you have to take care of her, after all, you shot her. Ok, check her leg, bullet went right through, doesn't look like it hit the bone or anything, good, but she's lost a lot of blood, ok, get the bleeding stopped then clean out the wound. Clean out the wound, with what? I know! Bottled water. That's sterile, right?

I was working on her leg when she flinched--I didn't notice that she had drifted back into consciousness. I looked up at her, our eyes met only for an instant then she quickly turned away. She was still too weak to put up a fight, from loss of blood, or hunger, or both. She still wouldn't look at me and didn't make a sound, but I could see in her eyes, she was in pain and very frightened. She was crying, the tears ran down her face. I guess that was understandable, after all, she had no reason to trust me, and every reason to fear me. I don't know what bothered me more, that I shot her, or that she was so frightened of me. I tried to explain, "It was an accident, I didn't mean to hurt you. Please believe me." I didn't know if she understood. Could she speak or just make horse sounds? My plea for forgiveness didn't seem to work; she still wouldn't look at me. She just lay there with the blanket pulled up tight under her chin.

I got the bleeding under control and put the blanket over her leg. She was shivering, I think by now, more out of fear than the cold. I decided to give her a break, I needed one too. I went over to the kitchen area. My cabin is a one-room with a sleeping loft, and a kitchen and a bathroom under the loft. I put a pot of vegetable soup on the stove and wet a rag with warm water. I approached her very slowly as not to startle her and said in a soft voice, "I'm not gonna hurt you, just wanna wipe your face." There was still no response. How can I get through? I know, I was reading a book on Equine behavior. When a momma horse is trying to tell its baby that everything's all right it makes a sound called a nicker. It's a kind of low quiet, sound like when you are clearing your throat. Sally does it to me all the time. It can't hurt; I'll give it a try. I looked at her, "Ehe, ehe, ehe." She turned quickly to look at me then just as quickly turned away. A response, good, I think. She must be really confused by now, God only knows what's going on in her mind. Hurt, hungry frightened, and here is this guy who just a little while ago shot her, and now he's trying to tell her he won't hurt her again.

By now you could smell the soup on the stove. I could see her nostrils flare slightly as she caught its scent. "Would you like some?" Again no response. I went back to the stove and poured two mugs of soup. I went back to where she was lying and held one of the mugs out to her. She looked at it out of the corner of her eyes, her nostrils flared again but she wouldn't take it. I set it down next to her and motioned for her to help herself. I picked up my book on equine behavior and pretended to read, all the time watching her over the top of the book, to see if she would take the mug. It didn't take long for hunger overtake fear, and she slowly picked up the mug and began to drink. When she finished, she put the mug down and turned back toward the fireplace. I reached down beside her and picked up the mug. OK, I think that's enough for this evening. We both could use some sleep. I washed the soup mugs in the sink. I'll see you in the morning.

I went up in the loft and got in bed. I lay there for what seemed like hours, but couldn't sleep. I got up and put my bedroll on the floor next to the loft railing, where I could watched her from above. I eventually drifted off to an uneasy sleep. When I awoke, I found her sitting up with the blanket wrapped tightly around her. She was stirring the cinders with the fireplace poker, but it was out. When she heard me moving about she turned and looked right at me, only this time she didn't break off the stare. I could see in her eyes that she was still very uneasy. "Good morning. Are you feeling any better this morning?" She turned away again, as I came down from the loft. "Let's get a fire going, and warm this place up a little." I picked up some sticks, and she scooted back a few feet and grabbed her leg. "Easy now, we don't want to start it bleeding again." I figure if I just go about my normal routine she will get the idea, eventually, that I don't want to hurt her again. I put the sticks in the fireplace and lit them. The warmth of the fire seemed to ease her apprehensions a little.

I went into the kitchen to make breakfast. I wonder what she eats, I guess I'll make some bacon and eggs, oatmeal, and toast, and some tea. I put the food on a tray and took it to my guest. I sat down on the floor by the fire and put the tray between us. She backed up, only a few inches this time. But still avoided looking at me. I motioned for her help herself. She took a little of everything, and ate it hungrily. Good she can eat anything. Poor thing must be starved. I offered her some of mine, but she wouldn't take it from me so I just set it down on the tray. "You can have it, I'm not that hungry anyway," and I sipped on my tea. After she finished what was on the tray, I took it back to the kitchen and then got some fresh bandages and appropriate ointments. "Ok, it's time to check your leg now, and see how it's doing." She must have been feeling better because she held the blanket down over her leg and resisted my attempts to change her bandage, so I put the stuff down next to her. "All right, you can do it. I gotta feed Sally anyway. I'll be back in a few minutes." I put on my boots and heavy coat and went outside into the snow. I took my time with Sally and I put some more food out for the animals. I thought she could use some time alone, and I needed to think some things through myself. When I went back inside, I found her holding her leg just above the wound, a pile of bloody bandages, and a frightened expression in her eyes. "It's ok, let me look." This time she didn't resist. "It's not that bad." I got the bleeding stopped then took the bloody blankets to the washing machine, and brought back a clean blanket and put it around her shoulders. "Let's get you up off this floor." I put a comforter on the sofa and helped her to it and put her legs up on the ottoman. This time when she looked at me I didn't see quite as much fear in her eyes, more like puzzlement. She was trying to figure me out. "I have to go into town and get some more supplies; it seems I have another mouth to feed now. I'll be back before dark."

When I got to town, I went into the grocery and bought along with the regular stuff, several bags of apples and carrots. When I got to the checkout, he said, "You know your gonna spoil that horse." I said, "It's too late." And we both had a laugh. As I was heading back home I realized my houseguest didn't have any clothes, except the tattered rags she was wearing. So I stopped off at the General Store and picked up a denim skirt, a white cotton blouse, a terry bathrobe, and a brush and comb, then went home. I returned to find her right where I left her, she was picking at her fur. It was quite matted and still had dried mud in it. That must be uncomfortable. I went to the bathroom and ran her a tub of warm water and put a rag, couple of towels, the terry robe, and the hairbrush in there. "Would you like to get cleaned up?" I helped her to the bathroom. "You can wash up in here," and I returned to the living room, and read a book. After a while she came back into the room, her fur and hair clean and brushed, with the robe tied tightly around her waist. My gosh she's pretty. Light gray, with darker gray hands, feet, ears, and nose, and black hair, and tail. I couldn't help but stare at her. "Come sit by the fire. What can I call you? Do you have a name?" She picked up the poker and started to stir the cinders again, just like this morning. "I know, I'll call you Cynder. Is that ok? Cynder?" She just smiled. It's the first time she smiled since.... "Cynder, I have something for you." I held out the skirt and blouse. "Take it, it's for you." She took the clothes; it was the first time she took anything from my hands. That made me smile.

A week went by, and Cynder was healing nicely. She hardly limped anymore. I told her she could stay as long as she wanted. I'd hoped she would. I didn't realize how alone I was out here until she came into my life. In the weeks to follow Cynder put on some much-needed weight and got her strength back. She didn't look half starved any more. The weather started to warm up, the long winter was almost over. Then what I feared most, one morning I woke up to an empty cabin. I was alone again; Cynder had gone. I knew I was gonna miss the way her tail swished when she walked, and her soft brown eyes, and the way her ears followed me as I moved around the cabin, even when she wasn't looking. Well it was time for me to start looking for a job. Up until now I've been living on the money I made when I sold my house. Oh I still had plenty, but I needed to do something to get Cynder off my mind.

Several months went by, and I only thought about her occasionally. I was starting to get on with my life. Then one evening, I was out riding Sally, and when I returned home I got a surprise. Cynder was waiting on the porch. I got off of Sally and ran to her. She hugged me, and I her. "Oh Cynder, it's good to see you again." She held me so tight, I didn't think she was going to let go. Then another surprise, she spoke. "He-help ple-ease!" "Cynder, what's wrong?" "He-lp ple-ease!" "Ok, I'll help. What's the matter?" She pointed toward the cabin then to the mountains in the distance. "He-lp!" She pulled me to the cabin and into the bathroom and pointed to the first aid kit, then pointed towards the mountains again. I picked up the first aid kit. I climbed on Sally and pulled Cynder up behind me. "You show me the way." We rode as far as we could, then made camp for the night and got back on the trail at first light.

By noon we were there. A small group of morphs were living deep in the forest. They are so well hidden you could walk right by them and not even know they were there. I helped Cynder down then got down myself. One of the morphs took Sally to the creek to drink. Cynder took me to a cave where I found a Fox couple and a child, a young Fox boy. The boy's left leg and arm were badly cut up and infected and he looked to be feverish. "Oh man, Cynder, I don't have anything in this box for that." Cynder looked up at me as she held the boy's hand, his mother and father at his side. If I didn't do something the boy was going to die. "Ok, Cynder, we'll try. Cloth, I need clean cloth." They brought me some old cloths, old but clean. I showed them how to tear them into strips, and got a tube of antibiotic cream out of the first aid kit. "Cynder, do you remember this?" I pointed to her leg. She nodded. I showed the boy's parents what to do. "Put some on the boy's leg and arm, wrap it with a bandage, keep it clean, two times a day. Do they understand, Cynder?" She nodded again. "Ok, you come with me. I have to get some penicillin, and I'll need you to find my way back again. We leave at sunup." We rode Sally back to my cabin. I told Cynder, "You stay here, I'll go into town and get the stuff and I'll be right back." When I got back it was already too late. "We'll rest tonight and leave in the morning." I fed and watered Sally, and prepared a bed for Cynder. The next morning we were up early, had a quick breakfast, I packed several cans of soup, and a loaf of bread, and we headed back up the mountain. We arrived that evening and went straight to the cave. As I prepared the hypo, the parents looked on with deep concern, as they weren't too sure about me stabbing their child. "Cynder, tell them I have to do this to make him better." She nickered at them, and they seemed to understand, but I think they were still uneasy about me poking him with that needle. "Ok, we'll see how he is in the morning, just let him sleep for now. Well I'm hungry." All of the morphs watched with great interest and amusement as I made a circle of rocks, lit a fire, and cooked a pot of potato soup. Except for Cynder, I don't think any of them ever saw a can of soup before.

The next morning the fever had broken and it looked like the boy was going to be okay. Everyone was in a happy, almost playful mood. Which was in sharp contrast to the mood of yesterday. It seems that among the morphs, a child belongs to the whole tribe. They all share in the responsibility of raising that child. They all mourn for, and celebrate for that child. Today the celebration was not only for the boy, but also for me. Cynder and her people took me in to their tribe and I became a member of the family. I was honored, as no other human has ever been taken in before. The party went on for three days. When it was time for me to leave, I didn't want to go, but I was made to understand that I was welcome back any time. And I did go back many times, to see my Cynder, and the rest of my new family.

{To be continued?}